Are women really “better” than men?

After reading Ms Ally’s post, “Female Superiority: Are Women “Better” than Men?” and viewing the comments on the subject of Female Supremacy, I starting thinking about relationships in general. It wasn’t until the “second wave” of feminism (1960’s through the 90’s) that women also became head of household. It didn’t matter how much money they made or how much smarter they were, the men wore the pants and made the final decision for the relationship or family.  Men were dominant, and a good wife is submissive to her husband. The women’s movement clearly heralds the idea that women should have the same rights and be equal to men.

But is gender equality really possible and is it the best solution?

Men have sexual fantasies of being controlled by a strong woman, but it seems that it only lasts until he has an orgasm. The idea of her using him sexually seems more like HIS idea then hers. In my own world of being an independent and self sufficient woman, I too can fantasize about “wearing the pants,” but does the world really see me this way? And if they do, is it accepted as a normal relationship or looked at as an oddity or modern novelty?

Let’s face it, someone is always going to be more dominant in any relationship.

It seems to me that, any time there is an attempt at equality,  it ultimately turns out to be confusion, and someone feeling resentment for settling. Perhaps it’s possible, but I have never seen two alpha personalities coexist without great challenge.

When I was in college, I was often teased for my controlling nature. In fact, many of the men I dated seemed threatened by it and often challenged me. I resented this constant test of wills. I felt very much like a fish out of water and often depressed, wondering if maybe I was. It was ok for them in the bedroom, but once our clothes went back on, the male machismo swung into action. It wasn’t until I learned about BDSM and dominance and submission as a lifestyle that I began to feel like the woman I really was. It allowed me to focus my affection on men that appreciated me being a woman in control. But it still wasn’t a walk in the park. I had to fully accept this part of me, the dominant partner, and learn how to nurture the submission I craved from others.

In life there is always a leader to set the agenda and pace of any dynamic.

Only then can there be true harmony without struggle. Otherwise, you have too many Chiefs and too many Indians wondering what to do. When roles are clearly defined, there isn’t any confusion. The key is that both parties ENJOY the position they elect. This doesn’t mean that the submissive is less than the dominant, but that someone needs to relinquish control. It’s not really about female supremacy, although in MY perfect world this would be ideal, but a relationship dynamic that follows a ying-yang concept to achieve balance.

I’d really like to know your thoughts on this subject, and how you feel about gender equality. I’ve created a poll to get a general idea but would also appreciate your comments. Thanks!

 

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